OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
