Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
please come you make the beer taste better
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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