help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
