I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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