Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Randomize
