Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
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