oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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