Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
