Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize