you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Randomize
