My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
