yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
True strength comes from lack of pants
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Randomize
