My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
