But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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