my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize