i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
