So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
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