Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
