took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
