I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
