All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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