How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
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