yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
