Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
