I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
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Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
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I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO