Texts From Last Night

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  (917): View more from New York City

  I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!

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  (917): I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time! http://tfl.nu/fe3b
  Replies (18) Good night (3059) Bad night (670)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before

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  (630): between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before http://tfl.nu/2m53
  Replies (45) Good night (681) Bad night (4931)
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  (912): View more from Georgia

  you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.

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  (912): you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler. http://tfl.nu/cu8r
  Replies (9) Good night (4511) Bad night (681)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.

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  (413): i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool. http://tfl.nu/ncnm
  Replies (17) Good night (976) Bad night (4140)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed

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  (717): I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed http://tfl.nu/mass
  Replies (6) Good night (2277) Bad night (1443)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.

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  (608): hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink. http://tfl.nu/2o9s
  Replies (4) Good night (1249) Bad night (546)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?

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  (317): What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am? http://tfl.nu/0wpx
  Replies (8) Good night (1779) Bad night (762)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"

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  (770): After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me" http://tfl.nu/acul
  Replies (22) Good night (3509) Bad night (1132)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.

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  (617): The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library. http://tfl.nu/8dpw
  Replies (2) Good night (1210) Bad night (916)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?

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  (248): What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence? http://tfl.nu/gb31
  Replies (6) Good night (1202) Bad night (920)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.

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  (502): So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina. http://tfl.nu/7j91
  Replies (10) Good night (509) Bad night (749)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.

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  (701): I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control. http://tfl.nu/z8ao
  Replies (4) Good night (569) Bad night (401)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.

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  (847): How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text. http://tfl.nu/b9ph
  Replies (15) Good night (650) Bad night (332)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover

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  (602): Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover http://tfl.nu/gmcv
  Replies (0) Good night (369) Bad night (242)
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  (585): View more from New York

  I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.

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  (585): I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet. http://tfl.nu/tbft
  Replies (2) Good night (375) Bad night (517)

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