so explain again why im purple
no
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
