i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize