if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I have demons in me.
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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