lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Randomize
