Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
