Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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