your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
