Texts From Last Night

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  (323): View more from California

  WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.

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  (323): WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag. http://tfl.nu/8spr
  Replies (6) Good night (1456) Bad night (2223)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.

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  (724): This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text. http://tfl.nu/bfqf
  Replies (15) Good night (2503) Bad night (1261)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.

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  (734): I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day. http://tfl.nu/chx4
  Replies (51) Good night (5313) Bad night (707)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest

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  (413): this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest http://tfl.nu/t110
  Replies (22) Good night (5344) Bad night (945)
• Favorite

  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number

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  (709): a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number http://tfl.nu/syte
  Replies (14) Good night (3031) Bad night (1334)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted

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  (847): I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted http://tfl.nu/5rf7
  Replies (6) Good night (2540) Bad night (1122)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.

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  (757): We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out. http://tfl.nu/e9z5
  Replies (4) Good night (1219) Bad night (3674)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar

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  (313): My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar http://tfl.nu/fy9n
  Replies (6) Good night (3267) Bad night (741)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.

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  (603): I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay. http://tfl.nu/s25q
  Replies (8) Good night (4059) Bad night (1083)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.

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  (802): My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward. http://tfl.nu/hjrs
  Replies (8) Good night (1425) Bad night (1011)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal

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  (440): I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal http://tfl.nu/vouk
  Replies (1) Good night (843) Bad night (477)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.

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  (570): Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore. http://tfl.nu/httm
  Replies (1) Good night (1233) Bad night (387)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome

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  (732): Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome http://tfl.nu/8jcl
  Replies (27) Good night (2229) Bad night (2284)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.

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  (619): Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming. http://tfl.nu/68ul
  Replies (4) Good night (831) Bad night (451)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr

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  (330): do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr http://tfl.nu/tk9o
  Replies (0) Good night (774) Bad night (365)

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