so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
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She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
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oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
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