Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha http://tfl.nu/twp9
  Replies (17) Good night (1555) Bad night (765)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness. http://tfl.nu/0zt1
  Replies (8) Good night (789) Bad night (1969)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off. http://tfl.nu/d6pj
  Replies (188) Good night (800) Bad night (4762)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all. http://tfl.nu/abug
  Replies (15) Good night (1231) Bad night (4245)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home http://tfl.nu/61ja
  Replies (63) Good night (1008) Bad night (5422)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (573): The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season http://tfl.nu/ewwq
  Replies (37) Good night (1846) Bad night (9411)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on http://tfl.nu/bnty
  Replies (17) Good night (10445) Bad night (1197)
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (705): You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden. http://tfl.nu/3tyu
  Replies (11) Good night (1972) Bad night (1158)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips http://tfl.nu/x2sl
  Replies (25) Good night (770) Bad night (1357)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar. http://tfl.nu/zoch
  Replies (2) Good night (601) Bad night (523)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB. http://tfl.nu/41ax
  Replies (5) Good night (660) Bad night (363)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that. http://tfl.nu/qu2b
  Replies (2) Good night (1163) Bad night (291)
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (864): I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population. http://tfl.nu/aqkb
  Replies (3) Good night (488) Bad night (273)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors. http://tfl.nu/8d4k
  Replies (1) Good night (459) Bad night (283)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt! http://tfl.nu/8lpp
  Replies (5) Good night (786) Bad night (375)

Randomize