Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
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his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
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It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.