Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
