we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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