so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I got her a Nickelback box set.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
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..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
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watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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