last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
