I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
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