i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
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