I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
they need to just BURY HIM!
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
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I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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