That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
