i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
