That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
