one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
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We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
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"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.