Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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