she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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