If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Randomize
