I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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