we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
