so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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